Married Inc.

I recently received an invitation that referred to John and I as Mr. & Mrs. John Green (and yes, the people sending it know my name and how to spell it). Hmmm. I have to say I found the reference disturbing enough that I felt it warranted a post on Married-Inc. I know this is a common practice, but I suggest it’s a bad one, and one we should abandon.

I changed my last name from Garus to Green when I got married. The decision to do so was easily made and I really didn’t think too hard about it or agonize over it. Basically, I wanted us to have the same last name, so why not? Furthermore, I’ve never been crazy about Garus as no one pronounces it correctly, and after I hit them with Malgosia, Green is a relief to most people because it’s so easy to spell. In exchange, I got the right to pick our children’s names. Pretty sweet deal I think.

So, being Mrs. Green hasn’t really bothered me at all. It was a bit weird at first, but I got over it. It’s kind of nice, actually. The Nuvvo colors are green, green is one of my favorite colors, I’ve got green eyes, I voted for the Greens in the last federal election, I like the outdoors. Yeah, green is good. If John’s last name had been Butt or Bucket or something like that, he might have be Mr. Garus, and I’m certain I’d be Mrs. Garus.

So this brings us to the whole point of why Mr. & Mrs. John Green is disturbing. I suppose my first thought is “When did I lose the privilege of being refered to by my own name?” I mean, now that I’m married, do I not matter? Is it sufficient to refer to me by my husband’s name? It eerily echoes back to the old custom of man’s ownership over his wife. Seriously, what is wrong with Mr & Mrs. Green? The extra John thrown in seems to imply that his name matters, and mine does not. Was it not enough that I changed my last name?

I’ll stop my rant here in fear of becoming too preachy. I love being married, I love my husband’s name, and I have no issue with being Mrs. Green. But please please please don’t refer to me as Mrs. John Green!