Married Inc.

By now I’m sure anyone reading this blog knows John and I are no longer working full-time on Nuvvo. John isn’t working on anything these days, actually, besides Rapleaf that is. I must report that we are both going through some serious withdrawal at this time. After all, we have spent the last two years working on Nuvvo together, every day. We shared in its ups and downs. We knew what our other half was working on, pretty much every minute of the day. We understood each other’s daily experience intimately. We grew together. Now, to a large extent that is over, and as terrifying as working with your spouse may seem to some, it was something we truly enjoyed. And miss dearly.

Why? I’m perfectly aware that to many people this much of one person, any person, would be enough to drive them to insanity. I think I’ve experienced that with previous relationships. You know, you go on your first vacation together, and by the end of the first week you wish your partner would just get lost so you can have some peace and quiet. I’ve been there. I suppose John and I have gotten to the point where being together is just like being alone, but better. Really. I’m sure some of you out there know what I mean. You’re together, there is no expectation of talking, or being anything that your “alone” self. It’s nice.

I suppose this takes the mystery out of your relationship. There is no need to even ask how your day went. To some people, mystery is a good thing. Not to me. I get enough mystery with pretty much the rest of this world’s population. Having almost no mystery with my spouse is just the way I like it.

So does lack of mystery equal lack of romance? Not really. Maybe if you get turned on by strangers… Living in San Francisco, and being surrounded by some very strange and smelly ones on the street makes me say I’m not of that camp.

In the end we’ll get past our withdrawal and I’m sure we’ll get used to our new lives of separation. We still get weekends together. And I still totally “get” everything John goes through. We can still share our love of technology… But I don’t think we’ll ever learn to like it. I think mostly everyone wants to have a partner to share their life with…well…at least one who makes them happy. If you find someone, why wouldn’t you prefer to spend your workday with him or her over some random people at your office? I guess all we can hope for is that some of those random people become real friends, and our days aren’t completely wasted with people we don’t love, or even like all that much.